I Value Myself
15 Feb
I wrote a post about this probably sometime in 2007. I deleted all of my posts since then but there’s always time to re-visit this topic. Have you ever met someone who seems to be completely secure with everything about themselves? The person who seems to be always put-together without effort? Usually, we’re the ones who look at those people and wonder why things cannot be so easy for ourselves?
During my middle school years, I constantly looked at other people my age and wondered why didn’t they have so many troubles I did? I felt like I was always battling something just to make it by. I never felt flawless. When I saw myself, all I did see was flaws. I was in a constant mental comparision with anyone who seemed to be aroud my age. I did not value my intelligence. I felt like I had to be more intelligent. I did not value my beauty. I compared myself to others who I felt were more beautiful than I was. For years, I never understood why I could not be of worth and value to anyone. Not that I was not, but I could not feel that I was because I was not valued and deemed worthy by myself.
Do you know how much self-appreciation and self-worth mean in life? If you are constantly putting yourself down, how do you feel others view you? If you are constantly pointing out your flaws, what do you think others see? When I looked at other people, I saw what was wonderful about them. If I could not see their flaws, why did I waste so much time thinking others only saw mines? We all know that no one is perfect. There is no perfect person. When we constantly admire others and proclaim their perfections, we are rejecting ourselves. When we can look at a person and see how “perfect” that seem to be, we only see how imperfect we are. Once we establish that everyone has imperfections, our views of ourselves become a bit more realistic.
After middle school, I went on to spend my sophomore year in another school. I was extremely shy. After a year of little-to-no contact with anyone my age, I felt overwhelmed with all of these “perfect” people. I did not see anything wrong with anyone else but myself. The little self-value I had gained within a year was diminished within a few hours. However, I was older. I do not know if it was with my age group or simply the people I surrounded myself with, but I saw that others valued me. They valued me more than I valued myself. I did not see the intelligent, talented individual they spoke about. I only saw an awkward fourteen year-old who did not fit in. After time continued to on, I began to accept the flaws I saw in myself. I was taller than most girls my age, so what? I was very intelligent. I was able to maintain a 4.0 GPA effortlessly. I didn’t struggle with volleyball or any of my other extracurriculars. I was doing well.
I learned that my self-image appeared as I wanted it to be. If I believed in who I was, that so many more opportunities were opened to me. When we stop valuing others more than ourselves, we begin to see what others value in us. A sense of self-worth is not offered to us overnight. Some of us are not taught the need to love one’s self. Achieving true happiness is impossible without self-appreciation. When we love ourselves, it is harder for others to take advantage of us. We are no longer easily subjective to abuse and manipulation. We put ourselves above things that will eventually become destructive. We understand that we are more important than cheap thrills or long-processed pain. Of course that makes us a bigger target for others to attack, but we know value ourselves enough to fight back.
I do value myself. I have a high sense of self-worth. I know I am not perfect. I have many flaws, but I embrace them. I know I am a beautiful person. I believe in everything I do. I do not do things without thoroughly thinking them through. I am just that lovely of a person. I encourage everyone to value themselves in a way that cannot be demolished by others. You can never fully love anyone else if you do not love yourself first.
Welcome to Static-Romance.Org, your number one stop for design and life inspiration. My name is Angel Y. and I'm a newlywed nineteen year-old freelance graphic designer and front-end web developer. I enjoy fashion, web, graphic, and interior design. I co-own 
Basically, we share the same sentiments. Idk if you read my poem “I Love Myself” on LJ or Facebook back late december, but it pretty much everything you said here. Loving yourself is VERY important. No one is perfect, perfection doesn’t exist. It’s foolish to continuously compare yourself to people because then you’re going to constantly find flaws. I used to have low self esteem. I honestly believe I was really ugly. I was overweight and teased and it just seemed like everyone looked better than me. It was untl I surrounded myself with positive people that I began to love myself. I didn’t have to be like everyone else, I didn’t need to be. Now, I am very confident and I love myself. You can’t truly love someone else until you love yourself. & as you said, once you love yourself, you know better than to put up with foolishness (abuse, manipulation, etc). Once you start loving from within, it begins to show on the outside… does that make sense? I really want to work with adolescent girls and help build their self esteem some point in my life :).
This is such a lovely post. When I was a pre-teen, I was extremely shy as things like that as well then came a point where I stopped caring because I gained confidence in myself that I’d never seen before and after that, no one could tell me anything. lol
Shannons last blog post..Random Thoughts 001.
Hey there Angel :)
Thanks for the comment, you have some of the same top 5 actors as me :P
Great topic! You know you are such an amazing article writer… I think you should write as a career!
Anyways, I agree, you can’t do anything amazing if you are not feeling good about yourself. You must love yourself in order to move forward.
I’m so glad you feel what you do Angel, let’s hope I get there soon… I’ve been kind of depressed lately, and I don’t know why!!
Peace!
Hey there Angel!
You’ve been tagged…. Please visit my blog to know more.
This was a great post angel. it gave me a lot of questions to ask myself that i don’t normally ask. Especially wondering how do people view me if i only focus on my flaws instead of appreciating the great qualities i do have. Self- esteem is something i’ve struggle since i was younger and working on in therapy.
Love is such a strong word and some people don’t know how to love. I am one of those people. I never really knew how to love. I don’t even know if i’m capable of loving myself completely and fully. It a scary thing. I don’t know if i can actually love a man because of my past experience.
But what i know i can do, is try to love myself. It’s easier said than done.
At my age now, I can’t do nothing but compare myself to others. I could never tell that one girl I liked her, or go to the parties that occur sporadically because I always felt I wasn’t good enough. One of my fears is rejection, and slowly but surely I’m overcoming that fear. Still, I have low self esteem, but I realize this, and loving myself is a work in progress. I love other people for who they are flaws and all, and it’s odd that I can’t do the same for myself. I guess that I just want people to love me, but how could realize that when I don’t?
You’re right, no one is perfect and I think at some point in our lives we all doubt our appearance or simply just want to look better. I believe it’s a part of life and realizing we’re fine the way we are is a natural occurring life task we must all over come.
I used to put myself down a lot and it’s tone down some because I’ll always look at mirror and notice something but then the thought disappears from my mind. I have done a lot of growing up since I was a kid, having flaws don’t traumatize me anymore.
Sounds very inspiring. We may have some flaws but I think it’s a good thing that we’ll working on it and trying not to do it again. We don’t need people who’ll just say, “Hey you’re ugly, you’re out of here.” We actually need or want people who will value us, who will uplift our self-esteem and who will always say to us that we have to trust on ourselves.
I think that’s what I have trouble doing the most, loving myself. But I try. I’ve stopped putting myself down, but not to the extent that I come off as conceited.
Lexies last blog post..In need of ideas
I think we all went through a phase where we didn’t quite value ourselves. I know what you mean, being a tomboy I never thought I was beautiful enough to be worth anything. When we live in such a superficial world those things come so natural. I have learned that I am a great, beautiful, and intelligent women over time and I think that eventually everyone will grow out of that uncomfortable shell of doubful self-worth! *hopefully*
btw I love the previous post! The barbie doll fashion show is awesome!
Yea, what I find most sad is that sometimes loving yourself is a lot harder than one may think sometimes, when it’s suppose to be easy. I have trouble myself. I don’t know what’s so great about me, especially when my boyfriend or other people insist otherwise, I just don’t see it. lol.
But it’s true, you do have to love yourself, especially if you want to love others too. You must know yourself and love yourself to do others things properly and love others properly.
I defiantly know exactly what you mean, for the longest time all I saw in myself was imperfections and I compared them to other people who I thought were better than myself.
I’ve given up though on that way of thinking and the way I see it now is as long as I am happy with myself than that’s all that matters. Everyone is different and everyone is unique in their own way and loving yourself and being happy is what matters cause than others will see that :)
That was very well written, very inspirational <3
Very nice post. I know it’s hard not to compare yourself to others – but it is only damaging when you do. Instead of putting yourself down – you must learn to cheer yourself on – just like you would your friends.
Patty Evanss last blog post..Should I Stay In This Relationship?
Very Inspiring
Thanks a lot, a lot of things have happened to me, thanks to them, I’m starting to learn how to love myself ^^
Carlos´s last blog ..Lluvia